- Guy walking down the street complaining to his friend: “Now she’s got some Eggos divorced guy with kids”
Well, don’t blame him; his ex-wife got the waffle iron.
- Spam comment I received: “Crossants can make my small dog sick he vomit two times”
I think “cross ants” are actually more likely to make a small dog sick than croissants are, so points for accuracy.
- Note I accidentally typed in my July budget tracking document: $7 – coffee and scorn
Very possibly it was.
- Woman walking down the street, talking into her phone: “So now I’m just stuck sitting here so I just wanted to give you a heads up”
Lies! Vicious lies!
