It’s day 2 of daylight savings, so of course I woke up with the Christmas song “Up on the Housetop” stuck in my head. This sent me into quite a rumination about WHY it’s up on the “housetop” instead of “rooftop”? Who says housetop? Googling this troubling question only leads me to a “howstuffworks.com” explanation of how Santa delivers presents. It does, additionally, clarify that the next lyric is “reindeer pause” not “reindeer paws.” HOOVES. More housetop/rooftop conundrums via Duolingo,… Read more »
Posts By: Claire
Commentary
Student, describing one interpretation of the justice system and putting someone away for smaller but more convictable crimes: “Like when someone is a murderer but you can’t prove they killed someone, so you get them for taxidermy or something” Student describing a marriage: “Then Lady Macbeth is like, did you kill him without me? FOMO.” Train conductor, apropos of nothing: “People wobble but they never fall.” My Fitbit, confusing because I was simultaneously getting a text message and thought the… Read more »
Bits and pieces
Analog. Overheard on the train: One kid to another, describing a video game: “That’s the whole point. That’s the cool part about being a responsible dad.” Overheard from my students: High school student, reading Latin: “Delia, I only want to yoke oxen with you” Student: — Student: Chivalry isn’t dead! 11th-grade student, reading Sylvia Plath: “…and I eat men like air.” Student: SENIOR QUOTE There are deep thoughts and there are shower thoughts, but there are… Read more »
Bytes and Pieces
I thought I just heard my roommate say “Alexa, regime change,” but I’m thinking it was probably “Alexa, resume please.” Also heard in my apartment: “Think about how much rendering must have gone into these breasts. They’re very…breasty.” Speaking of the digital world–so, the advertising for Candy Crush has gotten a little…sinister and desperate, no? I usually ignore The Listserve emails even though I haven’t bothered to unsubscribe, but this one… Read more »
Fitbit
Here are some things my Fitbit credits as exercise: -practicing the drums (sometimes, it even gives me cardio!). It usually classes this as “outdoor cycling” -practicing the harp (it only logs this about half of the time, probably when I’m practicing faster music, and it automatically categorizes it as “walking;” since I *actually* walk at other times, I recategorized it. There is no option for “musical performance” or “fine-motor handwork,” so I went with “gardening”) -walking, but only if it’s… Read more »
Public Service Announcement
Today I misread “hazelnut” as “amazelnut,” which I think would be excellent branding. You’re welcome, nut lobby.
Final books of 2017
I’ve always liked the week between Christmas and New Year’s. This year I was even lazier than usual and spent most of my time sitting around in a panda suit and face mask, watching the new season of Black Mirror. I leave the house to go to yoga and also so that my Fitbit will congratulate me on things. I read three more books through the end of the year: Exit West, by Mohsin Hamid Secondhand Time, by Svetlana… Read more »
Book stack
I actually made some progress on my bedside book stacks, which is good as I was tripping over them with some frequency. Granted, I have tripped getting out of bed even when there’s only a pristine floor. I’m in the middle of both Love and Math, by Edward Frenkel, and Secondhand Time, by Svetlana Alexievich (so, technically, those are either *on* the bed or in my purse…but we’re being analog here). Still forming the foundation of pile #1 are Haunted… Read more »
What I Need
There are too many things that I hope happen in the world in 2018 that are depressing enough and obvious enough not to list. That said, I really need 2018 to bring me 1) a better approximation for “is not equal to” than =! (because really, that should be interpreted as a joyful shout of “EQUALS!” or “is excitement!”) 2) a past tense version of that sign. I need this both for a keyboard and also just for any written… Read more »
Graphic design
I intended to write this…I think before Halloween. With reading, I’m something of a completionist (I think the number of books I’ve started and not finished is five or fewer, and most in the past couple of years). With writing, clearly, a procrastin…ist. Anyway, as I was doing live-DJ yoga and thinking about mashup titles, I was also thinking about graphic design and visual puns. Their analogue re: sound is obvious–mixes–carrying on the declaration of “This thing looks like this… Read more »
