Overheard…
In the post office:
Elderly woman, complaining to post officer: “You cant just shove things that say “don’t bend” into a mailbox. I practically broke my fingers.”
Post officer: <mumble mumble, unintelligible behind glass>
Elderly woman: “Stop spouting your bubbaloo to my face. You’re a professional worker. That’s the problem with this post office–everyone just does whatever they want.”
Post officer: “I wasn’t the person who put that mail in your mailbox, ma’am.”
Elderly woman: “I’m not complaining about you. I’m complaining AT you. I’ve had it. Period. Amen.”
At a “gentle” yoga class:
60-something woman 1: “He’s not really that handsome, though, Ryan Gosling. He’s just cute.”
60-something woman 2: “They’re all puffy now. I don’t know if it’s fillers or what.”
Woman 1: “And they’re all tiny.”
Woman 2: “You know who I saw the other day? Who’s the guy…who’s the guy who goes around tasting food?”
Woman 1: “I saw Wolfgang Puck at a sample sale.”
Woman 2: “What were they selling?”
Woman 1: “You know, those placemats.”
Woman 2: “Food is one of my least interests.”
Woman 1: “I hate going downtown to restaurants. It’s all about the PR, you know. And I don’t mean the prime rib.”
In an elevator:
One guy talking to two other guys: “My New Year’s Resolution was to not drink…heavily…for a week.”
In the presence of children:
Ten-ish-year-old boy to his mom: “You know what’s so unfair? Dad says I can’t have media this weekend.”
Dad to child waiting for the F train: “Matthew. We do NOT chase pigeons on the platform.”
